The Day of the Jackhole

The Day of the Jackhole

Celebrating 40 years on this earth

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I am sewing in Home Ecomonics class. I am making what we call a ‘dag bag’ and I’m not sure if it’s because if you use one, you’re a bit of a dag, or it’s a shearing term for a bag that holds all the dags. It’s not important. A boy has recently sewn through the tip of his finger with the sewing machine, so Mrs. Button is swooping around like a hawk watching everyone.

My dag bag is bright yellow. I use Hobbytex to write the words WHAM! on it in alternating colors—pink and blue. One afternoon at the K-Mart Plaza, I find a pair of bright yellow fingerless gloves and badger my mother for the money to buy them. I point out the practicality of having gloves without fingers, because, you know, you can continue to work without taking your gloves off, thus keeping your hands toasty and warm and continue with high productivity. They are identical to the ones George Michael wears in the Wake me Up Before you Go Go video. I doubt his gloves get as dirty as mine.

George Michael is very pretty. His teeth are very white.

I don’t really understand how WHAM! fits in with my love of The Beatles and The Clash, but I don’t question it. Just go. Go with the flow.


Born in 1971?

Share a story about 1985 in the comments.

1985. Wake me up.

October 21, 2011

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